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|2. PERSUASION ENGINEERING® IN EVERYDAY LIFE - James Seetoo|
|3. SHARP: STRATEGIES FOR OPTIMAL THINKING AND BEHAVIOR - John G. Johnson|
|4. WHERE CAN I FIND WHAT ELSE IS HAPPENING?|
|5. SO, WHAT'S COMING UP?|
John La Valle
I usually get different requests for some tips on practical calibration. One of the people who emailed me has read NLP books, etc. and has noted that while she knows what to look for, she's not sure if she's always finding it.
Well, the one thing I suggest is that, if you are "looking" for something, or even "listening" for it, you may just be working too hard. After all, whenever you've lost something, chances are that you didn't find it while you were looking for it, but rather "remembered where it was" after giving up on it. It's not such an esoteric thing, actually.
It has to do with brain chemistry. Remember, you want more good chemicals being produced by your brain, the neurotransmitters known as neuro excitors, and less of those "negative" neuroinhibitors. When your brain is just full of those good neurotransmitters, the environment is ripe for those sparks zinging from one synapse to another, across cortical pathways even. People have been thinking that it's "hypnosis" that has people remember things more easily. Well, could it just be that that relaxation you experience also has your brain make certain combinations of chemicals that promote good transmitting of messages? Hmmmmm.
Now about that calibration thing. Practice just noticing the changes in people's faces, voices, physiology. With this being another somewhat big political election year here in the US, there are opportunities galore!! That way, you get to sit back and just notice. Relax, take notes. That way, you're free to experience just what it is you can see and hear (and feel).
Now, I've got to tell you that with all you can notice, it's probably what you're noticing already that is important. When someone asked me about what they were missing I had to ask them how they knew they were missing anything!
The problem for most people is they then try to attach some meaning to what they see or hear in terms of shifts. In the beginning, you may want to test your hypothesis' because you could be wrong. And that could be a mistake if you take action on what you think is when it isn't. And so you could always ask, "Is there something I've missed?" or "Is there something more I can tell you?"
All the interactions you have with people are experiences you and they are having. If you begin to think in terms of experiencing what's there when it is, then you begin to calibrate in a new way, or enhance the ways you have been calibrating.
So while calibrating the other person is important, it's also important to track other things, like their values and beliefs, criteria, modal operators, etc. Just relax and notice what you notice. Then move on to other things. It's not so important "what" they are doing as WHEN!! Now that's worth keeping track of: WHEN do they make a shift? What happened just before they made that shift?
Life is an adventure and all is there to excite us.
©2018 John La Valle
by James Seetoo
While NLP skills are generally thought of as being used in therapeutic or coaching situations, anyone who has taken Persuasion Engineering knows how easily these skills translate into everyday situations. If you approach every interaction as a "sales" situation and by sales, I don't mean you're always selling an object, but you are selling your ideas, influencing situations and sometimes this is something as simple as just getting someone to smile and have a little easier day.
Still, one of the areas that I have particular experience with is using these skills in job interviewing. Now, while I recommend you read Persuasion Engineering, get the video course of the same name or read my book, The 5 Keys to Hypnotic Selling, you don't really need a whole course to have a great interview (although you'll be even better when you do.)
So here are a few key things to do in a job interview and please remember that you can use these in any persuasion situation:
" Speak at the same rate as the person you're
speaking with. People generally process information at the rate
they speak. This has nothing to do with intelligence, just the
other person's process.
Remember to use these in your next persuasion situation, especially if you're going for a new job. I use the interview as an example as you'll really get good feedback on how well you're using the skills. It's important to note a job interview is not just with a company but also with potential clients or patients and when you get the criteria and values you can also make an informed decision as to whether or not to work with a person or a company.
Check This Out:
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What's more, this is far more than a magazine. Contains video interviews with celebrities and big names, who share their advice, their experience and their observations on life. Just click through to watch the interviews - which gave yet more advice and tips.
In all, The Best You is a smart, multimedia experience that will inspire, inform and entertain all at once - and guide you to become
"Can you recommend some CD's on hypnosis that I can listen
to, because I want to be smarter?" Alan asked me (name changed
to protect the so-called innocent). I've never been asked this
before, not until now. It's not for me to pass judgment on any
inquiries. No matter how unique they may be. For we want what
we want in order to satisfy values, intentions, needs, wants or
Alan said something which made me curious. To be specific, it was a word he used- "smart!" What did Alan mean? What was his definition of that particular word?
I had options at this point: I could've asked Alan to clarify what he meant by the word, or to clarify what he meant by the statement. Or even to ask how does he know that a hypnosis product will give him what he wants?...
I did none of the above. Instead, I went in search of this word's history. I discovered it (smart) comes from the Old-English term "smeart" which had several related meanings: sharp, precise, trim, quick wit, active, clever. This utterance got diluted over time, and lost some of its initial meaning. Today everyone uses this word (smart) in their own way.
It turned out what Alan really wanted was to be more precise in his thinking - at certain times - and on specific topics important to him, so that he felt more satisfied, more confident with actions he took afterwards. Put another way, tools for better decision-making were what he wanted.
If we want to be in a position where we are certain we're making the best decision(s) possible, satisfied with the actions we've taken, have options to choose from, and feel good about the choices we've made, - the output, then it's best to gather as much information possible about the subject we are focused on. This is the input phase. Tools to help you do that are abundant, with the most direct one being -questions! The quality of your answers rests on the quality of your questions.
The Meta Model or Journalistic Questions are great tools to help you to generate quality information-gathering questions. The more information you have, the better the processing strategies your mind will engage in. Think about it. The mind needs something to work on. The great writers, past and present (and future ones), understand that in order to write, to produce a meaningful piece of work, they must - read! Read to write. "Reading" doesn't imply books only, but reading the world, the environment you live in and are surrounded by. This act of reading for the writer, this immersion, is really the information-gathering phase, or, as advertising executive, Tor Myhren, calls it "inspiration overload," the step that gets his creative juices moving.
Another key driver for success is our state of mind. For if we are seeking to enhance the quality of our thoughts and behaviors we need to take this into account. There is a specific state for a specific activity! What states of mind do you think: endurance swimmer, Diana Nyad, the fastest man alive, Usain Bolt, Bookkeeper, Antoinette Tuff, world-class public speakers, or even individuals who've changed the world, entertain, so they can perform at an optimal level? This then begs the question: "What states of mind must you activate if you want to produce the right thoughts and actions?"
Other strategies for input are:
" Having and experiencing multiple points of views on a
This has got to be one of the best programs ever!!
I use it to access my emails from my PC in my office while traveling.
It sure saves me lots of time downloading through my office online
than through some connection in a hotel!! And if I forget to bring
a file with me in my laptop? Easy, I just use GoToMyPC
to fetch it from my office.
NLP Bandler® Products:
Plus These Most Favorites:
Magick & Change - Richard Bandler - John La Valle
- 2 CD set