TIME, TIME, AND TIME AGAIN!

John La Valle

AS I LIKE TO KEEP THINGS AS SIMPLE AS POSSIBLE, I thought I'd share this one with you.

HOW MANY PEOPLE would call a prospect and ask if they have the time to speak with them? Not many, I suppose. As I travel internationally, I get many responses like, "No, I'd never ask because they may say 'NO!' then what would I do!?

WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT TIME, and how it is one of the most valuable things we have, especially since it's gone no matter how we spend it, and once it's gone, it's gone, and that time doesn't really exists, except in our minds, how did it become so valuable? Well, it doesn't really matter here, because for many people, it is valuable.

SO, I GOT A CALL from a telemarketer just last week. The conversation went like this:

"Hello, may I speak with John La Valle, please?" "This is John." "John, I know you get lots of calls everyday, sales calls,
telemarketing calls, all kinds of calls. I want be right up front and tell you that this IS a sales call. All I'm asking for is 30
seconds to find out if you're interested in what I have to offer. At the end of the thirty seconds, if you're interested, we can
continue, or I can call you back at another time. If you're not interested at the end of the thirty seconds, I'll say 'Thanks.' and hang up. Can I have thirty seconds?"

NOW I'VE GOT TO TELL YOU that I do receive lots of calls. They don't last 10 seconds for many different reasons. This guy got my attention and fast. He appealed to one of my more important Meta Program sales tips: ASK IF THEY HAVE THE TIME." If they don't and you haven't asked, they're probably not going to be listening, anyway. If they say "No", then ask them when it would be convenient for them. And call them then.

NOW SOME OF YOU are probably saying, "C'mon John, this is too simple." Well, it is, but I'll bet you're not doing it. If you are, let me know. If you're not doing it, start and I'm interested in the results you will get. Take 100, 200, even 500 of your next prospecting calls. Divide them in half and keep track. With half of them, don't ask. On the other half ask. Keep track of your results. I'm interested in whether they stay on the phone with you and give you the opportunity to go further in your process. If you don't have something of value for them, don't bother calling at all, of course. If you have something of value, then go for the business.

LET ME KNOW YOUR RESULTS!!

©2008 John La Valle

I have been working with people who are recovering from drug and or alcohol addiction for the past 18 months on a daily basis and I began to realise very quickly that it was mostly the way that they were saying things to themselves that caused the most problems. I have had the honour of being able to study the things that they say on the inside and how easily it has been for them to talk themselves into depression, anxiety, fear and more addiction, the following is a glimpse at my research and the system that I have developed to help people to really tune in to what they are telling themselves, the amount of laughter and happy tears has inspired me to write to you and share what I call: Inner Resolve

One of the ladies who I had the honour of working with was sharing with me her daily thoughts that repeated without a break from the moment she woke in the morning until she went to sleep at night

This is what she said to herself: "I don't know whether I am good enough, I don't know whether I am good enough, I don't know whether I am good enough,"

I had her write it down on a large piece of paper and to say it to me with the same intonation and same inflection and to be fair it really didn't sound very nice. Now I have had lots of clients play around with their internal dialogue, move it outside of themselves change the intonation, accent, inflection, speed, direction etc.. without much success I am not sure why that is but I guess some people have a problem with remembering to practice. This day was a real catalyst for me because something different popped into my head and I began to play with what she was saying until through tears of laughter she told me she finally understood what she had been trying to tell herself and for all these years she had been wondering and doubting that she was good enough. Yes she was.

One lovely lady came to see me and told me that she kept hearing herself say: "I'm no good, I'm no good, I'm no good, I'm no good, I'm no good."

Someone else, a young girl who was totally lost and alone, found herself feeling suicidal repeating: "Nobody needs me to be around."

One man who had been in prison for a long time he was struggling coming off drugs and was suffering from depression was repeating to himself: "I'm useless, I'm useless, I'm useless."

One wonderful lady had been referred to me by her GP. She was such a sweet woman but she was beside herself as she hadn't slept through the night for as long as she could remember. When asked what she was telling herself she said she repeated over and over: "Don't think I will sleep tonight, don't think I will sleep tonight, don't think I will sleep tonight, don't think I will sleep tonight."

I have worked with over 300 clients in the past 18 months and the above is quite typical which got me to wondering around and I realised that all these people saying all these things to themselves they couldn't all be wrong!

So, maybe they were right! So on that day when Sarah* (not her real name) came to see me and told me she kept hearing herself say: "I don't know whether I am good enough, I don't know whether I am good enough, I don't know whether I am good enough."
I found myself doing something very different, the effect of which was a total transformation in the way I work with people. I now teach this as part of every lesson and use it in every one to one session, and I must say the effects are astonishing.

Lets Play!

"I don't know whether I am good enough, I don't know whether I am good enough, I don't know whether I am good enough,"
First of all I had her write it down and repeat it in the way she said it to herself: "I don't know whether I am good enough."

Next I changed two things:
The first one was the phonological ambiguity whether to weather
The second was a full stop after the word weather.

"I don't know weather." I asked her to breathe in and wonder if it mattered that she didn't know weather when there were plenty of people who did, like Michael Fish for example, at which point she started laughing and told me that every morning when she was seated at the breakfast table one of the women that she lived with would sit down next to her and tell her all about the weather in Scotland for that day, whether, weather she had asked her to or not this would have probably been really useful except for the fact she lives in Wales.

I had her repeat the sentence "I don't know weather", then had her add a little bit extra, "but it's OK because Janice does", which seemed to make her laugh uncontrollably.

Now I said, "Say the rest of the sentence", she took a breath in and said, "I am good enough", and I said, "Nice, that's what you've been telling yourself for a long time now", to which she sighed then burst out laughing again.

The next morning she met me by the front door and said, "This morning when I woke up, I looked in the mirror and said, "I am good enough" then I rushed downstairs to find out if it was snowing in Scotland!

I began wondering weather this was going to be something really exciting and . . .

In class that morning one of the ladies said, "I'm no good", and I smiled and asked her is she minded tuning in to what she was really saying, she looked intrigued and said sure go ahead I have felt like I am no good forever

I wrote on the board: "I am" and had her repeat it and know that it was an undeniable statement "I am", "Yes you are", I told her. Then I had her repeat I am to herself until she began smiling.

Then the next part of the sentence "No good" which I changed to "Know good", "Yes you do", I said, And I think it's more of a command, something you are supposed to do", "so what good do you know", I asked her, she listed many, many things.